Friday, June 19, 2009

Mario Kart Transcript

I was playing Mario Kart against other people online. Sarah was on her computer. When I finished playing, I found this IM from Sarah:

you are awesome and I love your cute head. and I decided that I am going to recite everything you say while playing Mario Kart: What the heck was that??............I haven't gotten one cube this whole game......ahhhh, no fair!.........nice try hickula!......pass me, please pass me.........quit picking mario circuits.....whos the ****** with the mustache choosing goldmine everytime?!?.........better not be mirrored..woohoo..........what the heck?!..oh, come on.......suck a freakin' monkey!........of course! dog gone it!

I have no further comment.

Our Murdering President

PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) is mad at President Obama because he killed a fly. They're all upset because he killed a fly. Don't believe me? Look it up. True story. They're angry because he killed a fly.

I find this ironic because this story proves that even after all these years, no one in PETA has a life.

Sunday, June 07, 2009

Tony Deaf

Me: Is that a guy singing or a girl?

Sarah: Guy.

Me: Wow.

This conversation occurred tonight while the Tony Awards were on. I was not facing the TV. This conversation happened like 8 different times.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

A Polite Death to Paris

This weekend while watching the MTV Movie Awards with the gang, a commercial for Paris Hilton's show came on (I forget what it's called. My New BFF? More like WTF). As soon as Paris's big ugly head came on the screen, Sarah shouted, "Ugggggggggggghhhh! I just wish she'd DIE!!!"

The rest of us all looked at Sarah and smiled (perhaps because we were all thinking the same thing?). Sarah turned and saw us staring at her and immediately corrected herself.

"I mean...I wish she would accept Jesus..."

(beat)

"...and then die."