The Gayest Sign Ever

We've been doing some work on a house in downtown Auburn. It's an old house with a wraparound porch but right now it's vacated. A real estate lady bought it and is in the process of flipping the house. Because it's owned by a real estate lady, we haven't been given a key to the house, instead there's one of those padlocks on the back door realtors have with a secret combination and the key is inside. You know what I mean.

Anyhow, there on the back porch the previous owners decided to put up one of those kitschy wooden signs. Remember when the "country" thing was in and everyone had wooden homemade-looking signs all over their houses, usually with blue ducks on them somewhere? This sign is like that. Maybe they found it in a Cracker Barrel location near me.

Anyhow, this is what the sign says, verbatim (I wrote it down, because it was too good to forget):

"I have a front door for my guests
but it's the back door my friends like best"

I think even my gay friends would agree that that, dear readers, is the gayest sign ever.